We live in a culture of reaction. Someone offends us, we respond instantly. A relationship frustrates us, we walk away. Difference challenges us, we resist it. We demand that others change to accommodate our preferences and that circumstances bend to our comfort. Patience is often dismissed as passivity, and tolerance is confused with weakness. We have forgotten what it costs to sustain a true connection.
The Adinkra symbol Akoma, meaning "heart," teaches a different way. While the heart is understood universally as a symbol of love, in Akan culture it carries additional weight: it represents the capacity for patience and tolerance. The Akan expression "Nya akoma," literally "Get a heart," means to take heart or be patient. Conversely, one who is impatient is said to be "Onni akoma," one who has no heart.
Akoma: Patience and Tolerance is an exploration of what it takes to sustain a relationship. It is a reminder that love without patience remains fragile, and that communities require individuals willing to tolerate difference for the collective good.
The Wisdom of the Heart
Akoma's simple heart shape is immediately recognizable, yet its Akan interpretation offers depth beyond surface sentiment. Here, the heart is more than an organ of feeling; it is a measure of one's capacity to remain steady when tested.
In Akan philosophy, patience and tolerance form the foundation for cohesive communities:
- Patience allows one to withstand delay, difficulty, or provocation without becoming disturbed.
- Tolerance enables one to accept beliefs and behaviors that differ from one's own.
To "have a heart" is to possess the emotional stamina to tolerate others' shortcomings and remain committed when circumstances strain the connection.
The Dual Capacity
Akoma carries instruction for how to maintain relationships through challenge:
- Cultivate Patience: Relationships require the ability to withstand difficulty without becoming disturbed. Akoma teaches that patience is not passive waiting, but active steadiness. It is the quality that allows love to endure long after the initial feelings have been tested.
- Practice Tolerance: No two people see the world identically. Tolerance is the capacity to accept these differences without requiring others to become copies of yourself. It is the recognition that difference itself is not a threat, but a reality to be accommodated.
Sustained Through Patience
At Deka, we believe patience allows relationships and communities to weather the inevitable strains of sustained connection. Akoma teaches us that "having a heart" means:
- Accepting that growth takes time: Rushing others only damages the connection
- Withstanding provocation: Responding thoughtfully rather than reacting impulsively
- Tolerating difference without requiring conformity: Allowing others to be who they are
- Remaining faithful through difficulty: Commitment that outlasts initial enthusiasm
- Building community: Creating space for those who think and believe differently
Akoma teaches that patience and tolerance are not separate virtues but two expressions of the same capacity: the ability to sustain relationship beyond comfort, to remain connected despite difference.
The Lesson for Today
Akoma offers timeless wisdom: true connection requires a heart large enough to hold both steadiness and acceptance.
When you wear or display Akoma, you are acknowledging that love without patience is fragile. You are making a statement that enduring relationships demand more than affection; they require the capacity to remain steady when tested. The symbol positions patience and tolerance as the bedrock of any connection that lasts, from friendships that weather conflict to communities that hold together despite diversity.
Closing Thought
As you move through your week, notice the moments when your patience is tested. When someone frustrates you, do you react or respond? When difference challenges you, do you demand conformity or make space for another way?
Akoma invites you to examine your own heart. Do you have the capacity for patience, to remain committed when tested? Do you possess tolerance, to accept others as they are rather than requiring them to become what you prefer?
In a world that values reaction over reflection and conformity over diversity, what would it mean to truly "have a heart"?
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